I'll tell you what's wrong. That no-good squirrel is helping himself to seeds from my new "squirrel- proof" bird feeder. See those little metal pieces? That dumb-ass sales woman said that they would hold the weight of a bird, but as soon as a squirrel stepped on one, it would collapse and dump the squirrel on the ground. Yeah, right. I'm demanding my money back.
I'm sick and tired of new-fangled junk that doesn't work. Give me my old washing machine that cleaned clothes faster than the new one, give me my old toilet that you only had to flush once, not three times, give me a daughter-in-law that isn't always traipsing around getting herself in trouble (that's Gertie, I'm talkin' about), give me...
Oh, oh. Gotta go, here she comes,
ps from Gertie - I don't know how she learned to post a blog, but now I'm in big trouble.